Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Paranoid much?

So, recently the little woman asked me if I would mind if she could get back into one of the things she was into before we met, but gave it up for financial reasons and the fact that I didn't care for it too much. Knowing how happy it would make her, I said she could get back into the BDSM stuff, as long as things didn't go too far.

Since then, one of her friends has been, in her words "up her ass", not to mention the nights she has spent on-line talking to prospective play partners.

All this doesn't bother me, per se, but I do find myself looking over her shoulder when she's IMing or e-mailing. That's not to mention the thoughts I've had of logging on to her Gmail or myspace accounts to read her stuff (she has passwords automatically saved on the comp, so it wouldn't be that hard to do).

This doesn't make me feel the best, let me tell you. Am I having second thoughts about this decision? Could it be paranoia? Insecurity? A mixture of all the above? I'm not sure.

what I do know is that my past relationships have ended over infidelity, so I may just be a little wary of another one ending that way.

4 comments:

The Hawg! said...

Damn! I hope you're kidding and just have a wonderfully dry sense of humor.

If my wife dropped something like that on me, I'd lose my mind...

Reel Advice said...

Hi there!

For me, allowing her to do those stuff was really not the best choice.

Why can't she be happy with you alone anyway?

Maybe right now I cannot think of anything to resolve your problems. But here is one thing, maybe playing virtually is one thing but if it goes beyond virtual and goes into the physical. You know what to do. Your wife should love you and only you. Why can't you do the BDSM stuff yourself with her? :P

Mystery Man said...

Mr. Hawg- if only i was joking

Reel Advice- hello to you, too! she's happy with me, but it's one of things she's into, like i am with sports and music. I have recently tried to do some of the BDSM stuff in theb edroom. Not quite to the extremes that go on at these parties, but the lighter stuff.

Sara said...

Hmm. Well, when I saw your post, I thought I knew what BDSM was, but thought you couldn't really be talking about that so I had to google it just to make sure there wasn't some new video game with the same name or something. But no, I was right, it is what it sounds like.

I think you are getting into some really dangerous territory esp if you're not also into it. Its one thing if it is mutual but if she is doing this on her own, you are going to really start to resent her.

I would get some marriage counseling soon so she can start to understand your side of things.

I really hope for the best for you two. But, you should have a say in this too.